Week 1: Second Friday roundup

Oh, so Ketel Marte is a power hitter now? I guess it's not so bad as long as it hurts the Red Sox.

STUDS: Max Muncy (CB) finished a triple short of a cycle, drove in 3 and walked. Nick Ahmed (CB) doubled twice, singled and scored 3 runs. Trevor Story (WLB) hit a 2-run homer and a solo homer. Ketel Marte (PM) homered from both sides of the plate — including a grand slam — as the Diamondbacks pounded the Red Sox. Joe Musgrove (FF) outpitched his Fish teammate Sonny Gray, striking out 8 and earning the win in 7 shutout innings. Ryan Braun (M) had a 3-run homer and an RBI single. Rhys Hoskins (LCL) went 3 for 4 with a walk, a run and 4 RBIs.

DUD: Jose Quintana (WLB) was a disaster in Milwaukee, allowing 8 runs and fanning 3 in a 3-inning loss.

Week 2: Second Thursday's Roundup

Scouting report: plus-plus fastball, plus-plus changeup, plus-plus curveball, minus-minus beard. Look at that terrible thing.

STUDS: Nick Markakis (HG) went berserk, going 5-for-5 with 3 doubles, 3 runs and 5 RBIs. A 16-point day without a homer. Stephen Strasburg (CB) struck out 9 in 6.2 shutout innings for the win.

DUDS: Willson Contreras (LCL) walked and made an error.

Week 1: Wednesday's Roundup

"Thank you for letting me hit off this pitching staff."

STUDS: Juan Soto (WLB) was a triple shy of the cycle, drove in 3 and walked. Joey Lucchesi (WLB) struck out 6 in 5 shutout innings for the win. Wade Davis (WLB) earned a win with 1.1 innings of shutout relief, striking out 2. Jacob deGrom (FF) struck out 14 in 7 shutout innings... and even earned the win, because the Mets scored 6 whole runs for him. Six! Slow down, guys, that should be enough for 5 more starts according to the equation you worked out last year. Jake also hit one the hell out of Miami's stupid stadium, which was awesome. Anthony Rendon (YA) was a triple shy of the cycle and scored 3 runs. Willson Contreras (LCL) homered, singled twice and drove in 2.

DUDS: Aaron Nola (HG) gave up 6 runs - on 3 homers - and struck out 2 in 3 innings. He didn't get the loss... because teammate David Robertson (HG) took care of that for him, allowing the walkoff run on a damn bases loaded walk. Nice work, Phillies pitchers who are on my team. That's a combined minus-5 points, ya turds. Ian Desmond (YA) singled and made an error. Of those two things, the single definitely surprises me more. Wil Myers (LCL) also singled and erred.

deGONE! #PitchersWhoRake pic.twitter.com/6iflUJivYE

— New York Mets (@Mets) April 3, 2019

Week 1: Tuesday roundup

With stiffs like John Ryan Murphy and Nick Ahmed in the lineup, it's no wonder Zack Greinke had to crank up the power.

Until this moment, Manny Machado actually thought his
teammate was Clemson wide receiver Hunter Renfrow.

Coming to you via tape delay...

STUDS: Hunter Renfroe (R) hit a 2-run homer and a solo homer, both off Arizona's Zack Greinke. Jean Segura (YA) went 3 for 5 with a double, 2 runs and 3 RBIs. The aforementioned Greinke allowed 3 runs and struck out 10 in a 6-inning win. He also hit a pair of homers and drove in 4 runs! Too bad ESPN won't let us count offensive stats for pitchers. Sorry, Adam. Bryce Harper (LCL) told those booing Nats fans where to stick it, missing only the triple for a cycle and driving in 3.

DUDS: Jorge Alfaro (R) scored a run and committed an error. Robinson Cano (LCL) singled and erred.

OUCH: Trea Turner got plunked on the hand during a bunt attempt and will miss time with a broken finger. Sorry, Ray.

Week 1: Monday Roundup

We're starting to see the problem with the Cubs defense. It's not leapfrog!

STUDS: Ketel Marte (PM) had 3 singles, 3 runs, an RBI and a steal. David Peralta (PM) doubled stwice, singled, scored twice and drove in 1. Ozzie Albies (R) had 2 doubles, a single, 2 runs, an RBI and a walk.

DUDS: Matt Strahm (HG) allowed 5 runs and struck out 2 in a 2.2-inning loss. Trevor Story (WLB) went 0-fer with an error. Cody Bellinger (R) singled and erred. Raisel Iglesias (R) allowed a run in an inning to take the loss. Anthony Rizzo (FF) singled and made 2 errors. Who does he think he is, Pedro Alvarez? Javier Baez (AL) singled and erred. In fact, the Cubs had 6 errors in the game's first 6 innings. Weird they lost. Austin Hedges (YA) made an error - maybe he should be a Cub!

Week 1: Sunday Roundup

Adorable elf Trea Turner needs a child-sized helmet.

Hey, it's my first time doing the roundup this season. Let's see how many Mets jokes we can cram in here.

STUDS: Christian Yelich (HG) just keeps on trucking. Hoe homered, doubled, drove in 3, walked 3 times and scored twice. Trea Turner (CB) homered twice and drove in 4, adding a steal and a third run scored. Trevor Williams (CB) struck out 6 in a 6 shutout innings for the win. Jake Arrieta (WLB) pitched kinda crappy but allowed only 1 run in 6 innings with 6 strikeouts for the win as the Braves wasted a gazillion walks. Ketel Marte (PM) tripled, singled, scored and drove in 2. Cody Bellinger (R) has a permanent reservation in this spot - he homered, singled twice and scored 3 runs. Sean Doolittle (YA) let in all the runners Trevor Rosenthal put on base to blow the save, but recovered for a 1.2-inning, 2 strikeout vulture win.

DUDS: Scott Schebler (HG) earned a spot on the pine with his 0-fer-and-an-error game. Walker Buehler - drafted 9th overall, let's not forget - had a rough first start, allowing 5 runs and striking out as many guys as I did yesterday in a 3-inning no decision. There will be better days for the pride of Vanderbilt, but yesterday was a stinker. Ender Inciarte (FF) walked and got caught stealing. Sonny Gray (FF) served up a steaming pile, allowing 2 earned runs in 2.2 innings to take the loss and making a really spectacular error. Eugenio Suarez - which you can't spell without a big ol' E - made an error and also walked.

Not a single Met joke! This is ridiculous. Where's Travis d'Arnaud when you really need him?

Week 1: Saturday roundup

You know it's a blowout when both teams use backup catchers on the mound. Russell Martin pitched a 1-2-3 inning,
but Arizona's John Ryan Murphy was no better than any other Diamondbacks pitcher. He allowed 7 runs in 2 innings.

Cody Bellinger shows the excitement hitters will feel
when the Diamondbacks pitching staff comes to town.

STUDS: Another awful day for the Arizona pitching staff means another big day for Dodgers hitters. Joc Pederson (PM) went 3 for 3 with a homer, 2 walks and 4 runs. Cody Bellinger (R) homered twice, singled twice and drove in 6. Justin Turner (M) went 3 for 3 with 5 RBIs, 3 runs and a walk. It was also a good day for catchers named Willson/Wilson. Willson Contreras (LCL) went 3 for 5 with 2 doubles, 2 RBIs and a run. Wilson Ramos (HG) doubled, singled, walked, drove in 2 and scored 3 runs. Cesar Hernandez (M) tripled, singled, stole a base, scored twice and drove in a run. Freddie Freeman (LCL) went 4 for 5 with 2 doubles and 2 RBIs. Jeff McNeil (CB) went 4 for 5 with a triple, a double, 2 RBIs and 2 runs. Juan Soto (WLB) went 3 for 5 with a double, 2 RBIs, a run and a steal.

DUDS: Zack Godley (WLB) got hammered by the Dodgers, allowing 7 runs and striking out 3 in a 5.1-inning loss. Robinson Cano (LCL) went 0 for 5 with an error.

WEATHER: The Reds-Pirates game was postponed and will be made up as part of a doubleheader later this season.

Week 1: Friday roundup

We're just going to say it. Cardinals fans don't deserve Paul Goldschmidt.

STUDS: Paul Goldschmidt (M) had a pretty good second game with the Cardinals, blasting 3 homers, singling, driving in 5 and walking. A.J. Pollock (M) went 4 for 6 with a homer, a double, 3 RBIs, 2 runs and a walk. That's a nice day for Reid's offense! German Marquez (HG) struck out 7 Marlins and allowed 1 run in a 6-inning win. Charlie Blackmon (CB) went 3 for 5 with a double, a steal, a run and 2 RBIs. Joey Lucchesi (WLB) fanned 7 Giants and allowed 1 run in a 5.1-inning win.

DUDS: I don't know... The San Francisco offense? The Los Angeles bullpen?

Week 1: Thursday roundup

The Nationals weren't the only ones having trouble picking up the ball out of Jacob deGrom's hand Thursday.
DeGrom has made 30 consecutive starts allowing 3 or fewer runs, which is a major-league record.

Welcome back for another great FBLG season, everyone! We hope you were able to catch some of the great action on opening day (like Rich). Or maybe you were stuck at work, forced to catch the highlights later in the day (like Brian). Either way, we're back with another season of terrible jokes.

Using FBLG's new PitchTraqckx technology (patent 
pending), we show the location of the 0-2 pitch that
Javier Baez hit for a homer off Mike Minor. 

STUDS: Jacob deGrom (FF) outdueled Max Scherzer, fanning 10 and picking up the win in 6 shutout innings. He's already halfway to last season's win total! Aaron Nola (HG) struck out 8 and allowed 1 run in a 6-inning win against the Braves. Hyun-Jin Ryu (HG) posted the same line against the Diamondbacks. Javier Baez (AL) hit a 3-run homer and a solo homer, but it came against Texas pitching, so big deal. Kyle Freeland (YA) fanned 5 Marlins and allowed 1 run in a 7-inning win. Rhys Hoskins (LCL) hit a grand slam, walked and scored twice. Josh Hader (LCL) went 2 innings to pick up the save and struck out 4.

DUDS: Zack Greinke got lit up at Dodger Stadium, allowing 4 homers and 7 runs while striking out 3 in a 3.2-inning loss. Miles Mikolas (PM) served up 3 homers — including one to famed slugger Jhoulys Chacin — and allowed 5 runs while striking out 3 in a 5-inning loss. Eugenio Suarez (AL) walked and was caught stealing.

SHOULDA STARTED THAT GUY: Joc Pederson (PM) homered twice, doubled, drove in 4 and scored 3 runs. Kike Hernandez (HG) walked, homered twice, scored 3 runs and drove in 3.

Injury report — draft day approaches!

Dodgers fans have seen an awful lot of this in the past few seasons. 

Hello again, FBLG owners! Our normal procedure from FBLG headquarters (it's a 40-story high rise smack in the middle of midtown Manhattan, of course) has been to provide multiple injury updates during the spring so you can adjust your draft preparation accordingly. Well, this year we decided that it makes more sense to just do one injury report before the draft. Also, we're kind of lazy and never got around to it. File your complaints to the usual place.

So here's a look at key injuries for each NL team. Not every player in camp will be listed here, so if you really need to know what's going on with the tender ankle of the Pirates' fourth-string shortstop, hit the Internet and do some research! (Joke's on you because the Pirates don't even have a FIRST-team shortstop.)

We don't plan to update this list before Saturday's draft, so you'll want to be on top of things in case the ace you have your eye on blows out his elbow in the next two days.

ARIZONA: 1B Jake Lamb is day-to-day with back tightness but is expected to be ready for opening day. SP Taijuan Walker is recovering from Tommy John surgery and isn't expected to return until June.

ATLANTA: SP Mike Foltynewicz, who has been out with a sore elbow, is throwing but isn't expected to return until late April.

CHICAGO: UT Daniel Descalso has a sore shoulder and might be ready for opening day. SS Addison Russell is suspended for the first 29 games of the season. SP Yu Darvish borrowed Rich Hill's blister but is expected to be ready for opening day. RP Brandon Morrow had elbow surgery in November and is expected to miss the first couple weeks of the season. RP Pedro Strop has a strained hamstring but hasn't been ruled out for opening day.

Hey, it's our first Mets joke of 2019! 

CINCINNATI: SP Alex Wood is recovering from a stiff back but won't be ready for opening day. SP Sonny Gray had elbow stiffness early in camp, but he's getting stretched out and should be ready to go when the season starts.

COLORADO: SP Antonio Senzatela is out for a while with an infected blister on his right heel, which just sounds unpleasant.

LOS ANGELES: SS Corey Seager is recovering from elbow and hip surgeries but is expected to be ready for opening day. SP Clayton Kershaw, out with a bum shoulder, missed most of camp and says he will need 20 more days to get ready for the season. 1B Max Muncy missed time with a sore wrist but will be ready to go for opening day.

MIAMI: C Jorge Alfaro has missed time with knee inflammation after crashing into a railing and re-injuring it sliding, but the team thinks he'll be ready for opening day.

MILWAUKEE: SP Jimmy Nelson is recovering from a shoulder injury and is expected to join the rotation in April. RP Jeremy Jeffress has a sore shoulder and will start the season on the injured list.

NEW YORK: C Travis d'Arnaud — yeah, it's shocking that he's hurt — is recovering from Tommy John surgery and battling for the backup job, and the team thinks he'll be ready for opening day. 1B Todd Frazier has a strained oblique and might start the season on the injured list. 3B Jed Lowrie has a capsule sprain in his knee and might start the season on the injured list. OF Yoenis Cespedes is recovering from surgery on both heels and isn't likely to be ready till midseason. He's scheduled to get reinjured two weeks later.

Pirates team doctors decontaminate after examining
catcher Elias Diaz and his mystery virus.

PHILADELPHIA: 1B Rhys Hoskins has a sore left shoulder and will be rested so he can be ready for opening day. OF Odubel Herrera is recovering from a hamstring strain and looks likely for opening day. OF Roman Quinn has an oblique injury and will start the season on the injured list. SP Jerad Eickhoff is recovering from surgery to address carpal tunnel syndrome; he might start the season in the rotation, in the bullpen, in the minors or on the injured list.

PITTSBURGH: C Elias Diaz has been out with an undisclosed virus and could start the year on the injured list. OF Gregory Polanco is rehabbing after shoulder surgery and is expected to return in April. SP Joe Musgrove had abdominal surgery in the offseason but is expected to start the season in the rotation. SP Chad Kuhl had Tommy John surgery and won't return this year.

SAN DIEGO: OF Travis Jankowski has a broken wrist; the Padres have not provided an update on his status, presumably because no one cares. SP Dinelson Lamet might return by midseason after having Tommy John surgery. SP Garrett Richards had the same surgery but won't pitch this season. SP Jacob Nix fell victim to the Padres' curse and has a torn ligament in his pitching elbow. You know what that means.

SAN FRANCISCO: SP Johnny Cueto is recovering from Tommy John surgery and isn't likely to pitch this year.

ST. LOUIS: 3B Matt Carpenter has been out all week with back tightness but is expected to be ready to go. 3B Jedd Gyorko has a calf injury, and his status for opening day is cloudy. OF Marcell Ozuna is recovering from shoulder surgery but appears to be ready for the season. SP Carlos Martinez had a platelet-rich plasma injection in his shoulder and will start the year on the injured list. He might not return until May or June.

WASHINGTON: 2B Howie Kendrick has missed time with a bad hamstring and could start the year on the injured list. OF Michael Taylor injured a knee and hip making a diving catch, and he might not be ready to start the season.