Week 8: Monday Roundup

"We get to face the Giants!"

STUDS: JT Realmuto (PM) homered, singled, stole a base, scored twice and drove in 2. Anthony Rendon (YA) homered, doubled, walked twice and scored twice. Mike Soroka (YA) struck out 7 and allowed 1 run in an 8-inning win. Ronald Acuna (WLB) homered twice and doubled. Chris Paddack (FF) struck out 7 and allowed 1 run in a 6-inning win.

DUDS: Mac Williamson (R) made an error. Josh Donaldson (CB) singled, walked and erred.

Week 7: The Check Swing

As always, a Google Image Search for "sad mets" is its own reward.

Perfect timing for me to come back to The Check Swing: the Mets are imploding and thinking that hiring Mike Scioscia will be the answer to their woes; the Nats are squandering their talent for the 65th consecutive year; the Giants just flat suck in the most boring possible way... it's a great time for me, personally. Oh and I guess the Dodgers are really good, but schadenfreude is much more enjoyable than actual success, right?

Damn you, Escobar.

1. The Rookies (1460.2 points, 3-4, last week 1): Henry's league-leaders slowed down a bit but earned another win, this time against the Misfits. Eduardo Escobar (33.5) continues to shove it right in my face after I badmouthed him pre-draft... not my fault, he was brutal for the Dbacks last year. Apparently it was a passing phase. He had 3 homers, 2 triples, a double, 2 singles, 7 runs and 10 RBIs last week... against the Pirates and Giants, but still! It counts. The league's leading scorer, MVP frontrunner and overall Dreamy Guy Cody Bellinger (23.5) had another big week, with 3 more homers. The rest of the offense sputtered a bit, "led" by Nolan Arenado (8). But who needs other hitters when you have Eduardo Freaking Escobar? Henry's pitching staff - which now consists of Dbacks, former Dbacks, and dudes named Zack/h - was strong again, led by Patty Corbin's 23-point gem. Zach Davies is cruising along with an inexplicable 1.54 ERA, much to the chagrin of everyone who drafted any other pitcher. And don't get me started on Robbie Ray (23 in 2 starts), the world's most unwatchable good pitcher.

This guy would watch Kyle Hendricks' fastball
rolling down the 101 and just chortle.

2. Project Mayhem (1418.2, 5-2, last week 2): Bill's team took the brunt of Adam's team's anger this week, apparently, putting up a nice week and getting pummeled all the same. It happens. Fortunately, we can lay some blame on a Cardinal, as Miles Mikolas (-6.7) had one of those days mama told you about, where every meatball you throw up there gets ripped to shreds. Luke Weaver (5) and Walker Buehler (9) weren't great, though Buehler was hurt by his defense. Soft-tossing righty Kyle Hendricks (29.7 in 2 starts) continued his bounceback season. Hendricks, Davies, Ryu... it's the rise of the sub-90 club! If you've got a fastball that wouldn't get pulled over by the CHP, it's your time to shine, baby. Bill's hitters continue to do damage, though Ketel Marte (10.5) and Franmil Reyes (4.5) cooled off a bit. Lorenzo Cain (26.5) hit a bunch of doubles, and as a team PM drew 18 walks. Even Brandon Belt drew a walk! Has anyone watched Brandon Belt hit lately? Why would you walk him? If you want him on base, just drill him and save yourself 3 pitches. Or, better, throw strikes and watch him ground out to second base.

3. Yari's Autonomics (1380.7, 3-4, last week 9): It appears Adam read his team the riot act after they were called out in this very column last week, and they responded with a 228.2-point week, a big win and a giant leap up the standings. The power of the written word, people. Don't take it lightly. It was mostly about offense for YA this week, with Josh Bell (34) and Anthony Rendon (33) tearing the cover off the ball. As a team, 13 doubles, 11 homners, 39 RBIs, 34 runs for Yari's boys, led by 4 homers and 10 RBIs for Bell. A quick word of pride in Josh Bell, as former riders on the Josh Bell First Base Express: I knew this dude would be good. I'm happy for him, but not for Adam. The pitching was solid across the board, except for apparently-he-kinda-sucks-now Max Scherzer (8). Zack Greinke (17.7), Mike Soroka (15) and Cole Hamels (13) all had solid wins, and even Sean Doolittle (12) got a couple of saves in spite of the Nats' best efforts.

Weird stuff happens when the New York
teams are out of the postseason.

4. When the Ledee Breaks (1357.2, 4-3, last week 3): Matt's bunch got an easy win with 28.3 total pitching points. That's hard to do, and deserves mention, unlike Matt's actual pitchers, who will not be named due to their stinkiness. So let's talk about his offense, which, as predicted, is very strong. Ronald Acuna (24.5) seems to be enjoying his return to the leadoff spot, Mike Moustakas (23.5) seems to be enjoying his return to third base, and Yasmani Grandal (24) seems to be enjoying it not being the postseason. Enjoy that October, Brewers fans! Notable Fat Guy Jesus Aguilar (4), already on his second FBLG team of the season, looks like he might have been a one-year wonder. Daniel Murphy (-0.5) didn't exactly explode off the IL, though he did make an error, so you know he's back to normal. Michael Conforto (9.5) attempted to play defense, and thus is now hurt. There's a lesson here, kids.

5. Clemente's Bucs (1343.5, 2-5, last week 4): Ray made sure Thanksgiving dinner will be awkward this year by finally, after all these years, besting his dad in an athletic competition. Congrats, Ray! How did he do it? Well, the way we all finally do it, by having one more Brewers starting pitcher than his competition. In this case, Brandon Woodruff (28 in 2 starts) was excellent to lead an otherwise mediocre pitching staff through the week. Well, that's not fair, Stephen Strasburg (19) was excellent as well. But we're not talking about him. He knows what he did. Among the hitters, Starling Marte (20), Charlie Blackmon (16) and Max Muncy (13.5) were the best of a fairly pedestrian group, though Trea Turner (5) did make his return to the laughable Nationals lineup. Slightly less laughable with him in it, I suppose.

From the Brewer family album.
So this will NOT be the first awkward Thanksgiving, check.

6. Lumber Co Lumber (1324.7, 3-4, last week 5): John's team couldn't do much of anything in the narrow loss to his no-good son. Jon Lester (-0.7) finally got hit around a bit, Jerad Eickhoff (4 in 2 starts) struggled mightily, and Tanner Roark (12 in 2 starts) took a pair of losses. Kenta Maeda (23.7) was great, and then fouled a ball off himself to land on the IL. On offense, Freddie Freeman (27) and Bryce Harper (22.5) showed signs of heating up, and Willson Contreras (18) hit the ball around. Noe one else reached double figures - not even Mighty Nick Ahmed (6), shockingly. Rhys Hoskins (3) and Corey Seager (-0.5) were the worst offenders. But let's not overlook the terrible week Robinson Cano (9) had, including pulling a Jerry Seinfeld - "I CHOOSE NOT TO RACE" - on a couple of double play grounders. Who would have thought that trading for a one-tool 36-year-old second baseman might be a bad move? LOLMets.

Inscription reads "anywhere is better than here, chumps."

7. Hassey's Girl (1322.8, 5-2, last week 6): Your faithful commissioners keep winning and slipping in the standings - the parts of this team never work together at the same time. It's like driving a Saab. This time, it was a 5-point win against the Arb Losers. Christian Yelich (27) hit the ball and Aaron Nola (25) had a dominant start - it's almost like there's a reason those guys were the first 2 draft picks for this squad. Hyun-Jin Ryu (17) continued his dominance and everyone else on the team just kind of existed. And we added another Met, which is a terrible idea. Two Mets! In the same lineup? What were we thinking. And then there's you, Jordan Hicks (-2.3). I can't believe I let Deka talk me into picking up the freaking Cardinals' closer. At least he got those negative points The Right Way. What a giant turd of a franchise. It's fitting for a city whose only significant landmark is a giant gateway showing people how to get the hell out of town.

8. Arbitration Losers (1304.7, 5-2, last week 8): Quick: what team does Bryan Reynolds play for? The youngster was Tim's leading scorer last week which, well, it's not ideal. Not that Reynolds (20) - ok, he's a Pirate - is bad. But with Manny Machado (13.5), Joey Votto (12.5), Javy Baez (15), Eugenio Suarez (15) and Madison Bumgarner (13.3), someone should be outscoring a part-time Bucco. But not last week in the narrow loss to Fighting Rick Springfields. All told, Tim's team hit 34 singles and only 12 extra-base hits in the loss... sounds like Votto is really rubbing off on his teammates. Kirby Yates (5) only had once chance but locked down another save, his league-leading 47th (needs fact-checking).

Artist's depiction of Rick's team last week.

9. Fresh Fish (1300.5, 4-3, last week 8): The Fish got caught, cleaned, deboned, filleted, grilled and devoured by Matt's bunch last week, falling in the net without much of a fight. Newcomer Austin Riley (8) looks like the real deal after a sweltering first week (some of it on the bench, sad to say), and Kris Bryant (25) continued his scorching stretch. Beyond that, there isn't much to look at on the offensive side. Alex Verdugo (13.5) is taking advantage of increased playing time, and Marcell Ozuna (19.5) is heating up. But Anthony Rizzo (6.5) is slumping, Amed Rosario (4) at least didn't make any errors, and Francisco Cervelli (0) is at least really quite Italian. Perhaps he shouldn't have tried hitting with a spaghetti noodle last week. The pitching, which is clearly this team's strength, was not great, with Chris Paddack (1.7) finally running into a good offense, Jacob deGrom (-1) doing his Max Scherzer impression, and Luis Castillo (14.3) and Clayton Kershaw (14) having good-but-not-amazing starts. Rick's team is young, so we'll just sit back and enjoy the roller coaster.

10. The Misfits (1216.8, 1-6, last week 10): The league's elder statesman put up a valiant fight before losing to the Rookies. Speaking of old men, Ryan Braun (26.5) hit a ton of singles and drove in a bunch of runs... who does he think he is, James Loney? Hit the ball over the wall, steroid boy. Other old men on this team include Adam Jones (17.5) and Yadier Molina (14.5), plus Justin Turner (3), who didn't do much. Since a torrid start, Paul Goldschmidt (11) has cooled off, probably because God hates the Cardinals. Reid's pitchers struck out a bunch of guys and scored some points, with Jack Flaherty (23 in 2 starts) and Noah Syndergaard (22 in 2 starts) both doing well. But Jon "The" Gray (4.7) struggled, Sean Newcomb (4.7) is in the bullpen now, and Edwin Diaz (2) is a Met. Such a Met.

Batting leaders after Week 7

1. Cody Bellinger (R) 196.5
2. Christian Yelich (HG) 182

3. Josh Bell (YA) 163

4. Paul DeJong (PM) 160.5

5. Freddie Freeman (LCL) 154

Pitching leaders after Week 7

1. Luis Castillo (FF) 146.7
2. Hyun-Jin Ryu (HG) 135.3
3. Stephen Strasburg (CB) 134
3. Zack Greinke (YA) 133.7
5. Patrick Corbin (R) 130.7

and they say true love doesn't exist 😂 pic.twitter.com/WbCTKii3W9

— MLB GIFS (@MLBGIFs) May 21, 2019

Week 7: Sunday Roundup

A goofy, chunky lefty wearing 99, throwing 89, and putting up zeroes? It's Deka's dream pitcher.

STUDS: Hyun-Jin Ryu (HG) continued his mastery, throwing 7 shutout innings with 5 strikeouts to earn the win. That's 31 straight scoreless innings for the Round Mound of Renown. Josh Hader (LCL) struck out 3 and earned the win in 2 shutout innings.

DUDS: Jordan Hicks (HG) allowed 2 runs and took the loss in 1.1 innings, striking out 1. Rhys Hoskins (LCL) made an error.

Week 7: Saturday Roundup

Josh Bell is hammering the ball this year for an otherwise sorry Pirates team.

STUDS: Aaron Nola (HG) struck out 12 and allowed 1 run in a 6-inning win - and amazingly, his bullpen held the lead. Quite a feat. Josh Bell (YA) continued his breakout season, homering twice, singling, walking and driving in 4. Paul DeJong (PM) homered, doubled, walked, scored twice and drove in 4. Stephen Strasburg (CB) allowed a run in 8 innings, striking out 7 for the win.

DUDS: Corey Seager (LCL) made an error that led to 3 unearned runs. Jon Lester (LCL) struck out 3 and allowed 5 runs in a 4.1-inning loss. Josh Hader (LCL) struck out 2 but allowed a run in a 1-inning loss. Daniel Murphy (WLB) walked and erred.

Week 7: Friday Roundup

The rumors of Kris Bryant's demise may have been exaggerated.

STUDS: Kris Bryant (FF) had 3 homers - in 3 straight innings, to basically the exact same spot (see below) - adding a single and 5 RBIs. Pete Alonso (HG) hit 2 solo homers. Rich Hill (HG bench, oops) struck out 10 in 6 shutout innings to earn the win. Cody Bellinger (R) homered, doubled, and scored 3 times. Jorge Alfaro (YA) homered, singled, scored twice and drove in 3. Willson Contreras (LCL) had a homer, 3 singles, a walk and 2 RBIs. Ronald Acuna (WLB) had a double, 2 singles, a walk, 2 runs and 3 RBIs.

DUDS: Miles Mikolas (PM) allowed 7 runs and struck out 2 in a 1.1-inning dud. Eric Hosmer (CB) singled, walked and erred. Jacob deGrom (FF) took the loss, allowing 6 runs and striking out 3 in 5 innings.

Home run No. 9 on the season for @KrisBryant_23! pic.twitter.com/foLwSWf4S0

— Chicago Cubs (@Cubs) May 18, 2019

7 dingers in 12 games, KB is 🔥🔥🔥. pic.twitter.com/pMITFNMtnW

— MLB (@MLB) May 18, 2019

 

KB makes it THREE. pic.twitter.com/AnkiHDeTYk

— MLB (@MLB) May 18, 2019

 

Week 7: Thursday Roundup

When the Phillies are serving up pitches like yesterday, there will be a lot of hugs by the opponents.

STUDS: Christian Yelich (HG) homered twice, doubled, stole a base and scored 3 runs. Zach Davies (R) struck out 5 and allowed 1 run in a 6-inning win. Freddie Freeman (LCL) homered, singled twice, scored 3 runs, walked and drove in 2. Yasmani Grandal (WLB) homered, walked twice and drove in 4. Mike Moustakas (WLB) homered, singled twice, scored twice and drove in 2.

DUDS: Keston Hiura (FF) went 0-fer with an error.

Week 7: Wednesday Roundup

Is it even possible to say "Mike Soroka" without setting it to the tune of "My Sharona"?

STUDS: Eugenio Suarez (AL) was a triple shy of the cycle and drove in 3. Eduardo Escobar (R) homered, doubled, walked, scored 3 runs and drove in 3. Patrick Corbin (R) struck out 11 and allowed 1 run in an 8-inning win. Anthony Rendon (YA) had 2 doubles, a single, 2 runs and an RBI. Zack Greinke (YA) struck out 5 in 7.2 shutout innings to earn the win. Mike Soroka (YA) tossed 7 shutout innings with 3 strikeouts for the win. Kenta Maeda (LCL) struck out 12 in a 6.2-inning win, also driving in both of the game's runs.

DUDS: None. (gallery clap)

Week 7: Tuesday roundup

Mike Foltynewicz is 0-3 with an 8.02 ERA in 4 starts this year. In 2018, he went 13-10 with a 2.85 ERA.

STUDS: Yadier Molina (M) hit a 3-run homer and doubled. Noah Syndergaard (R) struck out 6 and allowed 2 runs in an 8-inning win against the Nationals. Josh Bell (YA) homered twice, drove in 4 and walked. Kyle Hendricks (PM) fanned 7 and allowed 1 run in an 8-inning win against the Reds. Brandon Woodruff (CB) struck out 5 and didn't allow a run in a 6-inning win.

DUDS: Jerad Eickhoff (LCL) got knocked around by the Brewers, allowing 5 runs and fanning 2 in a 4-inning loss. Mike Foltynewicz (CB) really got knocked around, though. He allowed 8 runs and struck out 4 in a 4.2-inning loss to the Cardinals.

OOPS: The Fresh Fish kept Joe Musgrove (17-point outing) on their bench and got a bad outing from the normally studly Chris Paddack (1.7-point outing).

Week 7: Monday roundup

The Brewers got 5 hits from Lorenzo Cain and still didn't win.

STUDS: Eduardo Escobar (R) was a double short of a cycle, scored twice and drove in 3. Lorenzo Cain (PM) collected 5 hits — including 2 doubles — stole a base, drove in a run and scored once. Robbie Ray (R) allowed only 1 run and fanned 6 in a 5-inning win.

DUD: Eric Thames (HG) walked and made a hilarious error.

TRADE: Yari's Autonomics have traded 1B Pete Alonso to Hassey's Girl for OF Nick Markakis.

Week 6: The Check Swing

It's a good thing Rich isn't here because he'd get lost in Kris Bryant's dreamy eyes. 

We're going to be honest: This edition will be a little shorter than usual. The commissioner's office is operating one man short, as Rich is somewhere in the Caribbean scouting a second baseman who's rumored to be the second coming of Jose Lind.

1. The Rookies (1277.5 points, 2-4, last week 1): Our points leaders lost a close one to the Arb Losers in Week 6, but they still maintain about a 65-point lead. Still, it's odd for the top team in the rankings to have a losing record. Henry got a bunch of points from hurlers Zack Wheeler (21), Patrick Corbin (20) and Robbie Ray (16.7) — all in single starts. At the plate, Nolan Arenado (25) surged into the top 5 in points for position players, Hunter Renfroe (22) went deep 3 times, and Cody Bellinger (20.5) was good despite not leaving the yard at all. The Rookies could have gotten more from Eduardo Escobar (6) and Austin Barnes (6), though.

Should pitchers earn bonus points for good mustaches?

2. Project Mayhem (1212.2, 5-1, last week 3): Bill's team put up 210 points in a win against Lumber Co and needed all of them. Walker Buehler (31) and Miles Mikolas (26) made the most of double-start weeks, as the PM staff allowed only 6 runs in 45 innings. No one on the offense really stood out, although David Peralta (19), Paul DeJong (18) and Ketel Marte (11.5) continue to be among the league leaders in points.

3. When the Ledee Breaks (1179.3, 3-3, last week 2): Matt's team was by far our low scorer for the week, which explains the drop in the rankings. The problem was the pitching staff, which went 1-3 and allowed 19 runs in 30.1 innings. Anthony DeSclafani (18) led the way in a 2-start week and was promptly served with walking papers. The offense was fine, with Trevor Story (20.5) as the high scorer. Story is one of 3 Rockies hitters in FBLG's top 5 position players — which includes a 3-way tie for 5th. Now that Juan Soto is back from the IL, that outfield of Soto, Ronald Acuña (14) and Michael Conforto (18) looks pretty strong.

Brandon Woodruff was really excited
to join Clemente's Bucs.

4. Clemente's Bucs (1177.8, 1-5, last week 4): Ray could file a grievance with the commissioners' office for unfortunate scheduling, and we wouldn't argue. Once again, CB had a strong week but was outscored by a hot team; in Week 6, it was a 212.8-190.7 loss to the Fish. Brandon Woodruff (19) has been a nice addition to the rotation, and Zach Eflin (21) has pitched like an ace at times. At the plate, Charlie Blackmon (29.5) has heated up — he homered 4 times and scored 9 runs in Week 6. Eric Hosmer (16.5) has been another nice waiver pickup, and Max Muncy (18.5) can put up points in a hurry.

5. Lumber Co Lumber (1163.7, 3-3, last week 5): John's team was a hard-luck loser, putting up 205.8 points against red-hot Project Mayhem. The LCL pitching staff was phenomenal, going 4-0 and allowing only 1 run in 32.1 innings with 29 strikeouts. Jon Lester (29.7) led the way with 12.2 scoreless innings. The offense was balanced, with every player scoring in the range of 11 points (Wil Myers) to 21 points (Freddie Freeman). Nick Ahmed (15) doubled 4 times, which might be his career high for a full season.

Jose Offerman is our favorite error-prone
shortstop, but he never played shortstop
for the Mets. 

6. Hassey's Girl (1157.8, 4-2, last week 6): The commissioners' pitchers finally got their act together, led by Hyun-Jin Ryu (42), who picked up 2 of HG's 4 wins and fanned 15 in 17 scoreless innings. However, Greg Holland (-2) was lousy in 2 outings and was replaced by *shudder* a Cardinal. The offense was all NL Central thanks to a healthy Gregory Polanco (28), rookie Nick Senzel (22.5) and MVP Christian Yelich (20). What ever happened to the offensive weapon formerly known as Wilson Ramos (4.5)?

7. Fresh Fish (1145, 4-2, last week 9): When Clayton Kershaw (11.7) is the weak link in your pitching staff, you have a dangerous team. Jacob deGrom (28) was outstanding in 2 starts, yet still managed to take a loss because Mets gonna Met. Chris Paddack (23.7) and Luis Castillo (22) were phenomenal in single outings, and Felipe "Vazquez" (16) recorded 3 saves. The FF offense finally picked up the slack, with Kris Bryant (34) homering 4 times, driving in 7, walking 8 times and scoring 9 times to lead the way. Alex Verdugo (20) and Anthony Rizzo (18) did a nice job riding shotgun, and Offer-med Rosario (14.5) made only 1 error.

8. Arbitration Losers (1132.5, 5-1, last week 7): Well, look at that. Tim is waaaaaaaay down here in the standings, but his team has 5 wins. Sounds like our former commissioner found a way to game the system. Anyway, the big story here was Eugenio Suarez (29.5), who did everything in bunches. Including make errors! Suarez hit 3 homers, 4 doubles and 5 singles; scored 10 runs and drove in 5; walked 3 times; and made 3 gaffes. Tim also got a nice week from Madison Bumgarner (27), who finally got enough support from the Giants' Triple-A offense to pick up a win. Meanwhile, we deny responsibility for Buster Posey (1.5) getting hurt shortly after we mentioned Scott Cousins.

Jason Heyward didn't produce a single hit for Yari's
Autonomics. He used this bat for every plate appearance.

9. Yari's Autonomics (1119, 2-4, last week 8): In a battle of bottom-feeders (sorry, Adam), YA came out just ahead of the lowly Misfits. The pitching staff was outstanding again, although Max Scherzer (32) picked up the only victory. Cole Hamels (21) and Zack Greinke (13) were good in no-decisions. Yasiel Puig (24.5) had a strong week to lead the offense; Puig homered twice and stole 3 bases. Josh Bell (18) also performed well, as Adam tried to manage his first-base platoon with Pete Alonso (4). Jorge Alfaro (3) was barely there but still helped the team more than Jason Heyward (-0.5).

10. The Misfits (1038, 1-5, last week 10): With zero transactions made, 2 injured outfielders, and 1 relief pitcher in the starting rotation, Reid's team appears to be a ship adrift at sea (no, that's not a Mariners joke). Although Jon Gray (11) and Noah Syndergaard (7) have pitched well, Jack Flaherty (1) has been a disappointment. Justin Turner (30) erupted for 5 homers and 10 RBIs, and Yadier Molina (20) is the top-scoring catcher in FBLG. But Paul Goldschmidt (21) hasn't lived up to his billing, Ryan Braun (9.5) is dinged up, and Jose Peraza (8) is struggling to get playing time.

Nolan Arenado and Trevor Story
power the Colorado offense.

Batting leaders after Week 6

1. Cody Bellinger (R) 173
2. Christian Yelich (HG) 155
3. Nolan Arenado (R) 143.5
4. Paul DeJong (PM) 136.5
5t. Javier Baez (AL) 134
5t. Trevor Story (WLB) 134
5t. Charlie Blackmon (CB) 134

Pitching leaders after Week 6

1. Luis Castillo (FF) 132.3
2. Hyun-Jin Ryu (HG) 118.3
3. Zack Greinke (YA) 116
4. Stephen Strasburg (CB) 115
5. Max Scherzer (YA) 112.3