Week 17: Monday's report

Even A.J. Ellis is stunned by the performance of A.J. Ellis.

STUDS: A.J. Ellis (SSS) homered, singled 3 times, drove in 5 and scored 3 runs. Andrew McCutchen (LGM) and Jayson Werth (LGM) each hit a pair of 2-run homers. Todd Frazier (Fish) hit 2 doubles, drove in 3 and scored a run. Bronson Arroyo (Rookies) struck out 6 in a complete-game shutout.

DUDS: Tim Lincecum's (PYB) quest for back-to-back no-hitters ended quickly. He allowed 8 runs and struck out 2 in a 3.2-inning loss. The rest of the Giants also earn a collective Dud for not scoring a run off Arroyo. Bobby Parnell (Rookies) allowed 1 earned run and 1 unearned run in 1 inning to blow the save and take the loss.

TRANSACTION: Testosteraun Braun has placed Ryan Braun and his entourage of dope fiends on the "DL" and replaced the suspended souped-up slugger with Logan Schafer.

NOTE: Cubs pitcher Matt Garza has been traded to the Rangers, meaning Going Going Gonzo can keep him or drop him — and get a free move to replace Garza if he's shown the door.

Head-to-head scores

Fresh Fish 26, Arbitration Losers 5
Testosteraun Braun 25, Rookies 25
Silver State Sagebrushers 39, Pitch You Blockhead 11
Misfits 27, Going Going Gonzo 21
Lawyers, Guns & Money 39, Manwaring a Muumuu 11