Week 17: Friday's report

Daniel Murphy had a busy day.

STUDS: Daniel Murphy (Braun) had 2 homers, 2 singles, 3 runs and 5 RBIs in the first game of a doubleheader. In the second game, he singled twice but committed an error. Clayton Kershaw (SSS) struck out 8 and allowed 1 run in an 8-inning victory. Matt Harvey (Muumuu) struck out 7 and allowed an unearned run in 8 innings, but the Mets couldn't get him the win.

DUDS: Sergio Romo (Braun) allowed 2 unearned runs and took the loss while striking out 1 in 0.2 inning. Brandon Belt (SSS) went 0 for 3 and made the game-losing error. Yasiel Puig (LGM) went 0 for 4 with 3 Ks and was caught stealing.

NOTE: Cubs OF Alfonso Soriano has been traded to the Yankees, so the Rookies have the option of keeping Soriano or dropping him and getting a free move.

Head-to-head scores

Arbitration Losers 137, Fresh Fish 133
Rookies 127, Testosteraun Braun 120
Silver State Sagebrushers 138, Pitch You Blockhead 95
Going Going Gonzo 141, Misfits 121
Lawyers, Guns & Money 162, Manwaring a Muumuu 147

Week 17: Thursday's report

Yovani Gallardo hasn't seemed like himself this season.

STUDS: Bryce Harper (Misfits) was a triple short of the cycle, scored 3 runs and drove in 2. Mat Latos (Muumuu) allowed 1 earned run and struck out 4 in a 7.2-inning win. Wade Miley (Arbitration) also allowed 1 earned run and struck out 4 in a 7.2-inning win.

DUDS: Rafael Soriano (Misfits) allowed 4 runs and struck out 1 in 0.1 inning. Evan Gattis (Braun) went 0 for 4 with an error. Yovani Gallardo (Rookies) allowed 6 runs and struck out 4 in a 3.2-inning loss.

TRANSACTION: Lawyers, Guns & Money placed SP Tim Hudson on the DL and acquired free agent Zack Wheeler.

Head-to-head scores

Arbitration Losers 124, Fresh Fish 92
Rookies 112, Testosteraun Braun 89
Silver State Sagebrushers 109, Pitch You Blockhead 87
Going Going Gonzo 124, Misfits 92
Lawyers, Guns & Money 132, Manwaring a Muumuu 110

Week 17: Wednesday's report

Not even an injury to Tim Hudson can stop the Warring
Zevons from kicking the stuffing out of the Muumuu Crew.

STUDS: Nate Schierholtz (Arbitration) drove in 5 runs and was a triple short of the cycle. Andre Ethier (Gonzo) had 2 doubles, 2 singles, 2 RBIs and 1 run. Yasiel Puig (LGM) was a triple shy of the cycle, scored twice and drove in 2. Tim Hudson (LGM) allowed 2 runs and struck out 9 in a 7.2-inning win. Francisco Liriano (Misfits) didn't allow a run and struck out 8 in a 7.2-inning win. Carlos Gomez (Rookies) had 2 doubles, 2 singles, 2 RBIs and a steal.

DUDS: Troy Tulowitzki (Misfits) went 0 for 4 with an error. Anthony Rendon (LGM) went 1 for 4 with an error.

NOTE: Manwaring a Muumuu placed a conditional DL claim on OF Domonic Brown. Carlos Quentin would replace Brown in the lineup.

Head-to-head scores

Arbitration Losers 90, Fresh Fish 70
Testosteraun Braun 75, Rookies 72
Silver State Sagebrushers 100, Pitch You Blockhead 72
Going Going Gonzo 101, Misfits 76
Lawyers, Guns & Money 126, Manwaring a Muumuu 55

Week 17: Tuesday's report

Gerrit Cole is 5-3 with a 3.51 ERA this season.

STUDS: Jose Fernandez (Arbitration) scored a run and struck out 8 while allowing 2 runs in a 7-inning win. Adrian Gonzalez (Gonzo) homered, singled, drove in 3 and scored 3 runs. Todd Frazier (Fish) had 3 singles, 2 doubles, 3 RBIs and 2 runs scored in a doubleheader. Gerrit Cole (PYB) singled twice, scored a run and struck out 4 while allowing 1 run in a 7-inning win.

DUDS: Shin-Soo Choo (PYB) went 0 for 6 with 3 strikeouts in a doubleheader. Dexter Fowler (SSS) and Carlos Gomez (Rookies) each were caught stealing while going 0 for 3. Anthony Rendon (LGM) went 0 for 4 with an error.

TRANSACTION: Arbitration Losers activate 2B Neil Walker, move 2B Martin Prado to an OF spot and boot OF Matt Kemp to the bench. FBLG insiders say Tim might get desperate enough to sign Calvin Murray and Marvin Benard to help in the outfield.

Head-to-head scores

Fresh Fish 61, Arbitration Losers 51
Testosteraun Braun 48, Rookies 41
Pitch You Blockhead 53, Silver State Sagebrushers 50
Misfits 53, Going Going Gonzo 46
Lawyers, Guns & Money 74, Manwaring a Muumuu 41

Week 17: Monday's report

Even A.J. Ellis is stunned by the performance of A.J. Ellis.

STUDS: A.J. Ellis (SSS) homered, singled 3 times, drove in 5 and scored 3 runs. Andrew McCutchen (LGM) and Jayson Werth (LGM) each hit a pair of 2-run homers. Todd Frazier (Fish) hit 2 doubles, drove in 3 and scored a run. Bronson Arroyo (Rookies) struck out 6 in a complete-game shutout.

DUDS: Tim Lincecum's (PYB) quest for back-to-back no-hitters ended quickly. He allowed 8 runs and struck out 2 in a 3.2-inning loss. The rest of the Giants also earn a collective Dud for not scoring a run off Arroyo. Bobby Parnell (Rookies) allowed 1 earned run and 1 unearned run in 1 inning to blow the save and take the loss.

TRANSACTION: Testosteraun Braun has placed Ryan Braun and his entourage of dope fiends on the "DL" and replaced the suspended souped-up slugger with Logan Schafer.

NOTE: Cubs pitcher Matt Garza has been traded to the Rangers, meaning Going Going Gonzo can keep him or drop him — and get a free move to replace Garza if he's shown the door.

Head-to-head scores

Fresh Fish 26, Arbitration Losers 5
Testosteraun Braun 25, Rookies 25
Silver State Sagebrushers 39, Pitch You Blockhead 11
Misfits 27, Going Going Gonzo 21
Lawyers, Guns & Money 39, Manwaring a Muumuu 11

Week 17 Transactions and Lineups

Players acquired

Testosteraun Braun sign OF Eric Young Jr. (July move #3).

Pitch You Blockhead sign SS Omar Quintanilla (July move #2).

Misfits sign SP Wily Peralta (July move #2).

Players released

OF Jason Kubel

SS Didi Gregorius

SP Kyle Kendrick

Lineup changes

Testosteraun Braun: Bench SP Jeremy Hefner and OF Ryan Braun; activate SP Julio Teheran, OF Logan Schafer and OF Eric Young Jr.

Arbitration Losers: No changes.

Silver State Sagebrushers: No changes.

Going Going Gonzo: No changes.

Lawyers Guns and Money: Bench SP Lance Lynn; activate SP Jeff Locke.

Pitch You Blockhead: Bench SP Cole Hamels and SP Kris Medlen; activate SS Omar Quintanilla, SP Gerrit Cole and SP Travis Wood.

Rookies: Bench SP Paul Maholm; activate SP Yovani Gallardo.

Manwaring a Muumuu: Bench SP Mike Minor; activate SP Shelby Miller.

Misfits: Bench C Carlos Ruiz; activate C Brian McCann and SP Tony Cingrani.

Fresh Fish: No changes.

The Check Swing: Week 16

Where's your muumuu, Kirt?

A short week combined with a lack of movement in the standings means the update is presented without comment.

1. Manwaring a Muumuu (2,870 points, 12-4, last week 1).

2. Misfits (2,678 points, 12-4, last week 2).

3. Testosteraun Braun (2,567 points, 9-7, last week 3).

4. Lawyers, Guns & Money (2,564 points, 8-8, last week 4).

5. Arbitration Losers (2,543 points, 8-8, last week 5).

6. Pitch You Blockhead (2,464 points, 10-6, last week 6).

7. Going Going Gonzo (2,455 points, 5-11, last week 7).

8. Rookies (2,378 points, 7-9, last week 8).

9. Silver State Sagebrushers (2,298 points, 6-10, last week 9).


10. Fresh Fish (2,239 points, 3-13, last week 10).

Week 16: Sunday's report

9 runs of support? Save 6 of those for next game, guys.

STUDS: Matt Kemp (Arbitration Losers) came off the DL swinging a hot bat, notching a homer, double, single and 3 RBIs... before injuring his ankle in the 9th inning. Another DL stint is not expected, but you never know. Jayson Werth (Lawyers, Guns & Money) hit two solo homers. Elsewhere, it was aces wild across FBLG. Clayton Kershaw (Silver State Sagebrushers) enjoyed some rare run support, striking out 9 and allowing 2 runs in a 7-inning win and adding an RBI at the plate against the Nats. Adam Wainwright (Misfits) allowed 2 runs and struck out 7 in 8 innings against the Padres for his 13th win. Matt Harvey (Manwaring a Muumuu) continued to own the Phillies, striking out 10 in 7 shutout innings.

DUDS: Oh what a week for Testosteraun Braun's starting pitching. Two days after Jeremy Hefner's minus-6, staff ace Jordan Zimmermann allowed 7 earned runs in 2 innings, notching a strikeout in a loss for a minus-7. Bill's club had 4 starters this week... combine for minus-2 points. Andrelton Simmons (TB) had a hit and an error, as did Chase Headley (Arbitration Losers) and Aaron Hill (Muumuu). Rickie Weeks (SSS) was 0 for 4 with a K and an error (AKA the "Pedro Alvarez").

TRADE: Lawyers, Guns & Money and Manwaring a Muumuu complete their second trade of the season, with OF Carlos Quentin going to Muumuu in exchange for SP Jeff Locke.

Final head-to-head scores

Silver State Sagebrushers 104, Fresh Fish 102
Misfits 98, Testosteraun Braun 47
Manwaring a Muumuu 119, Pitch You Blockhead 64
Rookies 60, Going Going Gonzo 58
Arbitration Losers 74, Lawyers, Guns & Money 61

Week 16: Saturday's report

Paul Maholm left his start with a "wrist injury,"
which really means the Braves just couldn't
watch him get shelled any more.

STUDS: Gio Gonzalez (Rookies) struck out 11 in 6 shutout innings. Jonathan Lucroy (PYB) homered, doubled, singled twice and drove in 4. Dexter Fowler (SSS) tripled, singled, drove in 3, scored and stole a base.

DUDS: Paul Maholm (Rookies) lasted 3 innings and gave up 7 runs. Oh, he also took the loss and didn't strike out any of the free-swinging White Sox. Brandon Crawford (PYB) went 0 for 1 with an error. Anthony Rizzo (LGM) had a classic Joey Votto game, making 2 errors but singling and scoring. Lance Lynn (LGM) allowed 4 runs and struck out 1 in a 5-inning loss.

TRANSACTIONS: Arbitration Losers continue to play outfielder roulette, moving Matt Holliday to the DL and activating Matt Kemp.

Head-to-head scores

Fresh Fish 69, Silver State Sagebrushers 68
Misfits 71, Testosteraun Braun 36
Manwaring a Muumuu 76, Pitch You Blockhead 44
Rookies 51, Going Going Gonzo 47
Arbitration Losers 50, Lawyers, Guns & Money 45