Week 9: Friday Roundup

Mike Foltynewicz recorded 1 strikeout for each letter of his last name.

STUDS: Mike Foltynewicz (PYB) pitched a 2-hit shutout for his first career complete game. He struck out 11 Nationals. Chris Taylor (FDD) homered, tripled, drove in 4 and scored twice. Jameson Taillon (PM) struck out 6 and didn't allow a run in an 8-inning win. Chris Stratton (M) fanned 7 and didn't allow a run in a 6-inning win. Jose Peraza (SG) went 3 for 4 with a double, 3 RBIs and a run.

DUDS: Matt Adams (FDD) and Maikel Franco (FF) each went 0-fer with an error.

Week 9: Thursday Roundup

Clayton Kershaw returned, but he didn't throw a single pitch 90 mph or faster. Also, he might be injured again.

Let's go to St. Louis for live footage of
Felipe Vazquez pitching the 9th inning.

STUDS: It's a mostly Project Mayhem edition of Studs. Congratulations, Bill! Aaron Nola baffled the Dodgers, striking out 7 and allowing 1 run in a 7-inning win. Ben Zobrist was a triple short of a cycle and drove in 2. Francisco Cervelli hit a 3-run homer, singled and scored twice. Elsewhere in FBLG, Jose Quintana (CB) was Dr. Jekyll today, fanning 6 and allowing 1 run in a 6-inning win.

DUDS: Felipe "Vazquez" (R) had a remarkable meltdown against the Cardinals. He failed to retire a batter and allowed 5 runs — only 4 earned! — while blowing a save and taking the loss. That's a putrid minus-8. In other news, Clayton Kershaw's back! The lefty posted a 9-point no-decision for The Misfits, but he appears to be injured again; he's getting an MRI on his back. Oh, the irony. Rich's favorite Beaver, Michael Conforto (non-sex-offender category), singled, walked and erred for the Fasanos. Bryce Harper (AL) stole a base, walked and erred. Starlin Castro (BM) went 1 for 4 with 3 Ks and an error.

Week 9: Wednesday Roundup

So you're telling me that Citi Field caught fire even though the Mets' bullpen was in Atlanta? Were the owners trying to burn the place down for the insurance money? Did Dwight Gooden leave his crack pipe too close to some oily rags? What other jokes can we make about this incident? Comment below!

"Two balls and one strike."

STUDS: Ross Stripling (SG) looked like the Dodgers' new ace against the Phillies, striking out 9 and allowing 1 run in a 7-inning win. He also had an RBI single that we just don't care about anymore. Matt Kemp (FF) homered, doubled and drove in 4 runs. Max Scherzer (FF) took advantage of a terrible Baltimore team by striking out 12 and earning the win in 8 shutout innings.

DUDS: Travis Shaw (SG) went 0 for 3 with a walk and an error. Jake Lamb (FDD) went 0 for 5 with an error, but at least he didn't strike out. Miguel Rojas (CB) went 0 for 4 with an error.

Week 9: Tuesday Roundup

Old man hits two homers, pleases old man.

STUDS: Jake Arrieta (BM) struck out 5 in 7 shutout innings to beat the Dodgers, which actually seems like an accomplishment now. Asdrubal Cabrera (PYB) homered twice and drove in 3. Starling Marte (SG) doubled twice, singled, scored and drove in 3. Evan Longoria (M) had a pair of solo homers.

DUDS: Kenta Maeda (FF) struck out 2 and allowed 2 runs in a 1.2-inning loss before leaving with an injury. Zach Davies (PYB) struck out 4 and allowed 5 earned runs in a 5-inning loss.

HEY, IS THE METS BULLPEN ANY GOOD?

Another day, another #walkoff for the @Braves. pic.twitter.com/gAWekAXFMZ

— MLB (@MLB) May 30, 2018

Week 9: Monday Roundup

Call this a dirty slide? Pete Rose must be rolling over in his grave.

STUDS: Ryan Braun (BM) - no, seriously, stop laughing, he's still kinda good - had a homer, a double, 2 singles, 3 runs, a walk, a steal. The good juice must have arrived recently. Anthony Rizzo (PYB) homered, singled twice, drove in 3, and started an on-field kerfuffle that resulted in a manager being ejected. That's a solid day. Anthony Rendon (PYB) had a 3-run homer, a double and 2 runs scored. Caleb Smith (SG) struck out 4 and allowed a run in a 7-inning win. Trevor Story (M) homered, singled, scored 3 times and drove in 3. Christian Yelich (M) had a single, a homer, 2 steals and 3 runs. Freddie Freeman (R) had 4 singles, 2 walks, a run and 2 RBIs in a doubleheader. Chris Owings (R) had a 3-run homer and scored 3 runs. Gio Gonzalez (R) struck out 3 in 7.2 shutout innings for the win.

DUDS: Hunter Strickland (FF) allowed a run in a 0.1-inning loss but, hey, at least he didn't blow a save. Dansby Swanson (PYB) contracted gangrene from a wound he suffered at Antietam, leading him to go 0-fer with an error. Luke Weaver (CB) allowed 4 runs and struck out 3 in a 4-inning loss to score a perfect 0. Tommy Pham (PM) went 0-fer with an error.

SUPER DUD: Rhys Hoskins (CB) had the duddiest game ever, scoring a run, making an error, and fouling a ball off his face.

Rhys Hoskins fouls one off his face on what could’ve been the last strike of the game. #Phillies #Dodgers pic.twitter.com/OpLmObq6td

— Fabian Ardaya (@FabianArdaya) May 29, 2018

LET'S LOOK AT THAT AGAIN:

Rhys Hoskins the victim of FREAK play... pic.twitter.com/DWTR55dohH

— Marc Farzetta (@MarcFarzetta) May 29, 2018

Week 8: The Check Swing

Here's your chance to add an all-star to your rotation. 

We're almost halfway through the regular season, so let's take a brief look at our standings. The Vladimir Guerrero Division is top-heavy, with 3 teams tied at 6-2. The Chipper Jones Division has only 1 team with a winning record: the Stable Geniuses. Every team has at least 2 wins, so no one is out of the playoff chase yet. 

Remember before the season when we implemented the rule about waiver claims for all-stars coming from the American League? Well, be sure to email the commissioners with your requests because 2010 all-star Phil Hughes has been traded to the Padres. The line forms to the right, folks. PLEASE REMAIN ORDERLY. 

The scoreboard

Please be OK please be OK please be OK please be OK...

1. Fasano Don't Dance (1524.8 points, 6-2, last week 2): The commissioners claimed the top spot in the rankings thanks to a balanced offense and outstanding pitching. The collection of right arms combined for 80.3 points, with all starters reaching double figures. Brandon Morrow (7.3) was the low man as usual, since the Cubs use him only once or twice a week. Jacob deGrom (15) lowered his ERA to a league-leading 1.54, Nick Pivetta (26) was great in 2 outings, and Stephen Strasburg (18) and Jack Flaherty (14) picked up wins. The hitting was solid if not great, with Chris Taylor (19) leading the way and Nick Markakis (16.5) plugging right along. The return of Jake Lamb (12.5) should help, too. There's concern about Ronald Acuna after his scary-looking knee injury, though. 

2. Stable Geniuses (1518.2 points, 5-3, last week 1): With the exception of one player, Matt's team stunk up the joint in a loss to Project Mayhem. Travis Shaw (31.5) homered 3 times and drove in 10, but the rest of the Geniuses combined for 2 homers and 13 RBIs. The pitching was as vanilla as it gets: the staff went 0-1 with no saves and totaled 33.7 points. Jhoulys Chacin (15.3 in 2 starts) was the only pitcher to make an impact. Junior Guerra (7), Tyler Anderson (5) and Kyle Freeland (3.3) combined to strike out 8 batters in 18.1 innings. Scott Kingery (2) looked like a world-beater early this season, but he has vanished. Philly teammates Odubel Herrera (8) and Jorge Alfaro (6) also struggled in Week 8.

It's good to have you back in LA, Matt.

3. Fresh Fish (1470.7 points, 3-5, last week 3): Our closest battle of the week ended with Rick's team losing to the Misfits by 3.8 points. Scooter Gennett (34) certainly did his part, homering 3 times and driving in 10. He leads the NL in batting average and might be the best player ever nicknamed Scooter (take THAT, Rizzuto). Matt Kemp (19) had another good week, and it's clear who won the Kemp-for-Bour trade with the Fasanos now that the Fish have both players. If the Fish are looking for someone to blame for the loss, they can look toward their Giants: Andrew McCutchen (5.5), Buster Posey (4) and Hunter Strickland (4) didn't get the job done. The pitching staff went 3-0, with Kenta Maeda (23.7), Patrick Corbin (18) and Max Scherzer (11) picking up W's. However, Yu Darvish didn't pitch and landed back on the DL. 

4. Arbitration Losers (1454 points, 6-2, last week 4): Tim's team relied on its offense to defeat the Bucs and remain tied atop the Vladdy Division. Bryce Harper (23) and a rejuvenated Matt Carpenter (20) were the top producers, but Marlins J.T. Realmuto (19.5) and Derek Dietrich (19) weren't far behind. It does make the commissioners smile to see Addison Russell (5) playing just as badly as he did as a member of the Fasanos. On the hill, there were no notable performances. Chris Stratton (13) and Michael Wacha (11.7) earned participation trophies, and Hector Neris (10) deserves credit for not blowing any saves. 

5. The Misfits (1424.7 points, 6-2, last week 6): Reid's team was a 4-man show, and it was enough to earn a victory against the Fish. Walker Buehler (31) allowed 2 runs and fanned 14 batters in 14 innings to lead the staff. Tyson Ross (19.7) turned back the clock and looked like an all-star. Christian Yelich (29.5) ripped 11 hits and scored 8 times, and teammate Lorenzo Cain (25) did the same. The rest of The Misfits were pretty disappointing, though. Tyler Chatwood (-0.7) can't throw strikes; Evan Longoria (9) hit just as poorly as the rest of the Giants not named Crawford or Belt; Eric Hosmer (5) and Trevor Story (4) did next to nothing; and Gregory Polanco (4.5) is hitting .205. 

6. BodySuit Man (1421.7 points, 3-5, last week 5): Sure, Adam's team lost to PYB. Sure, the pitching was solid, with a 3-0 record and 76.3 points. But HOLY CRAP that offense. Have we ever seen a week like this in FBLG history? BodySuit Man pulled off the baseball equivalent of pushing women and children out of the way to escape a fire. These guys — Joey Votto, Adam Duvall, Ryan Braun, Jose Martinez, Starlin Castro, Willson Contreras, Jedd Gyorko and others — combined for zero homers and 6 RBIs. How is that even possible? Meanwhile, Sean Doolittle (20.7) picked up a win and a couple of saves, and Jake Arrieta (18.7) was outstanding in a win. Noah Syndergaard (11) and Tanner Roark (11) pitched well in no-decisions, too. 

7. Pitch You Blockhead (1404.7 points, 4-4, last week 7): Scott's team might not have any of the top 5 pitchers in FBLG, but he does have two surprising standouts who are awfully close. Miles Mikolas (30) and Mike Foltynewicz (25) took advantage of double starts to help PYB take down BodySuit Man. Mikolas is 6-0 with a 2.58 ERA in his first season back from overseas, and Folty is 4-3 with a 2.55 ERA. Nice drafting, Scott! Charlie Blackmon (19) and Asdrubal Cabrera (18) paced the offense as they have all season, and Battle of Manassas hero Dansby Swanson (14) chipped in nicely. Yasmani Grandal (3.5) had a terrible week, but that's how it goes with catchers sometimes. 

Bring back the 'stache, Miles Mikolas! 

8. Project Mayhem (1336.2 points, 2-6, last week 9): It was a strange week for Bill's team. PM defeated the top team in FBLG and moved up a spot in the rankings, and it did so while its pitching staff went 0-3 with 1 save and 1 blown save. But Zack Wheeler (19 in 2 starts), Aaron Nola (15.7) and Jameson Taillon (14.3 in 2 starts) did enough to help PM nail down the win. Good performances from key hitters helped, too. Marcell Ozuna (19) ripped 10 hits — including 9 singles — and newcomer Juan Soto (19) made a good first impression. In case you didn't notice, Nolan Arenado (18.5) is hitting .324 and Brandon Crawford (15) is hitting .315. 

9. The Rookies (1310 points, 2-6, last week 8): Henry's team didn't put up much of a fight against the Fasanos, and they dropped a spot in the rankings as a result. The pitching staff was the Achilles heel, with only Gio Gonzalez (15) and Zack Greinke (14 in a pair of losses) producing points. Trevor Williams (0), Jeff Samarzija (0.7) and Felipe Vazquez (0.7, 2 blown saves) might as well have stayed home. On offense, Eugenio Suarez (21) was the driving force, providing 8 of The Rookies' 14 RBIs for the week. Freddie Freeman (15) and Ozzie Albies (9.5) cooled considerably, and David Peralta (10.5) is stuck in a lineup with no A.J. Pollock and a struggling Paul Goldschmidt. And hey, check out that classic performance from Chris Owings (-2). 

Now you know how Ray feels about your performance
this season, Rhys.

10. Clemente's Bucs (1296.8 points, 3-5, last week 10): Ray's team is last in the rankings but does have 3 wins thanks to a league-low points-allowed total. That's the good news. The bad news is that CB's offense put up a sickly 83 points in a loss to AL. Brandon Nimmo (22) was fantastic considering that he's a Met, and Paul Goldschmidt (12.5) is showing signs of life. Boy, how bad is it going for Goldy when you're pleased with a 12.5-point week? Kris Bryant (11) and Rhys Hoskins (7) didn't do much, and that's a problem when your team is built around offensive studs who haven't been studly. Kenley Jansen (18) appears to be back to normal after a rough start that included him getting fired by the Stable Geniuses. Jose Quintana (3.3) continues to be maddeningly inconsistent. 

This guy is one of the best hitters
in the NL. THIS GUY.

Hitting leaders after Week 8

1. Ozzie Albies (R) 171

2. Freddie Freeman (R) 170.5

3. Nick Markakis (FDD) 168.5

4. Bryce Harper (AL) 160

5. Charlie Blackmon (PYB) 154.5

Pitching leaders after Week 8

1. Max Scherzer (FF) 199.7

2. Patrick Corbin (FF) 160.3

3. Stephen Strasburg (FDD) 148

4. Jacob deGrom (FDD) 145.3
5. Aaron Nola (PM) 144.3

Week 8: Sunday Roundup

There will be a spelling test later. 

STUDS: Stephen Strasburg (FDD) didn't last long against the Marlins, but it was enough for an 18-point outing. Strasburg struck out 8 and didn't allow a run in a 5-inning win. Albert Almora (R) went 3 for 5 with 2 doubles, 2 runs and an RBI. Carlos Gonzalez (FF) went 4 for 4 with a mile-long, 2-run homer and 2 runs scored. Walker Buehler (M) struck out 8 Padres and allowed 1 run in a 7-inning win. Frankly, you should make the Duds list if you DON'T score 19 points against San Diego. Mike Foltynewicz (PYB) worked over the Red Sox, striking out 7 and allowing 1 run in a dominant 7-inning win.

DUDS: Felipe "Vazquez" (R) pitched only 0.1 inning and blew his third consecutive save opportunity. He's also battling forearm soreness. Willson Contreras (BM) tripled and walked, but he offset it by making 2 errors. That's our Willson.

Week 8: Saturday Roundup

That feeling when you see the Mets on the schedule and it's not Syndergaard or deGrom on the mound. 

STUDS: Aaron Nola (PM) was outstanding against the Jays, keeping them hitless into the 7th and finishing with 10 Ks and 1 run allowed in a 6.2-inning win. Scooter Gennett (FF) went 5 for 5 with a homer. A couple of Brewers had big days in a 17-5 win against the LOLMets: Lorenzo Cain (M) doubled, singled twice, walked twice, drove in a run and scored 3 times. Christian Yelich (M) was a homer short of a cycle, walked, drove in 3 and scored 3 runs.

DUDS: Anthony Rendon (PYB) went 0-fer with an error. Ozzie Albies (R) walked, scored and erred.