Friday's report

The Super Glue and duct tape seem
to be holding Zack Greinke's elbow
together so far.

STUDS: Zack Cozart (Rookies) hit two homers and added a sacrifice fly, and Todd Frazier (Fresh Fish) homered twice and drove in a run with a single. Homer Bailey (Fresh Fish) struck out 6 Nationals in 6 scoreless innings and doubled. Wade Miley (Arbitration Losers), Zack Greinke (Fresh Fish) and Mike Minor (Manwaring a Muumuu) each put up 18 points with strong season debuts.

DUDS: Gee, how did the Reds end up with so many homers? Oh, Dan Haren (Lawyers, Guns & Money) was on the mound today. He allowed 4 homers and 5 sub-homers in 4 innings. Yadier Molina (Lawyers, Guns & Money) went hitless and made an error that cost the Cardinals a run — the only run scored in their 1-0 loss to the Giants.

TRANSACTION: To all of you who had Carl Crawford in the "first player on Manwaring a Muumuu to hit the disabled list" pool, be prepared to pay up.  Manwaring a Muumuu makes a conditional DL move because of Aramis Ramirez's sprained knee. Jedd Gyorko would replace Ramirez in the lineup.

Head-to-head scores

Misfits 142, Fresh Fish 135

Manwaring a Muumuu 116, Rookies 88

Pitch You Blockhead 91, Lawyers, Guns & Money 83
Silver State Sagebrushers 126, Going Going Gonzo 125

Testosteraun Braun 131, Arbitration Losers 111